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2005/9/27 SIX MONTHS!My daughter turned six months old today!
I got a chance to reflect on how much she's changed when I took her to Sears for her six-month portraits. I remember at three months, she didn't want to be put down--even for a minute--which made taking pictures difficult. And, back then, she was so floppy that getting her to pose was a challenge. Today was a different story. That little ham sat up and smiled at the camera. There was some eating of props, though. A wicker chair and some fake daisies will never be the same.
The change she's made in a mere three months is astounding. And six months ago she was a black-haired, yellow-faced, purple-footed blob that wouldn't open her eyes for more than a few seconds. Now I can't get her to shut them. (I thought the two-nap-per-day scenario would last forever. Silly me.) Today she's a curious baby who scoots, tries to eat houseplants (and anything else in her reach), and she giggles like crazy when I sing "Werewolves of London." I hate to sound like every other parent on the planet, but I have to say... they change so fast!
Lily, honey, thanks for the best six months of my life! What a fun, scary, exciting, sleepless, wonderful time it's been! Love you, my little pumpkin schnitzel. 2005/8/15 But, doctor, it was HUGE!My husband and I are not ones to overreact, but on Saturday we freaked out when our baby girl had a huge, red, hot welt on her forehead. We were at the zoo and 20 minutes after we got there, we noticed that she had a large insect bite on her head. Ten minutes later, a two-inch circle of puffy redness surrounded the site. That's when I decided: it's time to call my mother for advice.
Of course, my mother, always erring on the side of safety, said to take her to the doctor. (This is the last time I call my mom for advice.) Anyway, we leave the zoo and head across town to the urgent care center.
First, we had a really snotty nurse. She was literally picking on us, saying crap like, "You guys must be first-time parents," and my personal favorite, "Well, sweetie [directed to my daughter], you did fine, but your parents are a wreck." She also said that our daughter was dressed like "Nanoock of the North." She left us in the exam room, chuckling to herself about the couple of parent rookies that brought their child in with an insect bite.
But this is the embarrassing part: By the time the doctor came in to see our daughter, the welt was gone, leaving nothing but a teeny, tiny red dot. We assured him that it was HUGE, and that we weren't parents prone to overreaction. After examining our baby, and declaring her A-OK, he asked us if we had any other questions. (I suppose he figured that we must have other parenting questions, if we bring a baby in with a tiny bug bite.) We hung our heads low and said that we didn't have any other questions, but reiterated that the swelling had been significant and that's the why we came in.
It was HUGE, dammit. She could have been brain damaged or something. Geez.
Below is a picture of my daughter and husband at the doctor's office. (She looks fine here, but seriously, her head was really swollen!) 2005/8/3 Four months isn't funnyI know, I know. I haven't written in a long time. Let me explain.
First, thinking is a chore in this heat. It's hot. I'm crabby.
Second, now that my four-month-old daughter is napping less and wanting to do more, she doesn't much tolerate being put down while I write my daily blog. (She can be so inconsiderate at times.)
But the real reason is: four months isn't funny. My baby is now a cute little person, making cute little baby talk, and is as smiley as can be. She is simply delightful. Unfortunately, that's not funny. Screaming at toys--now that's funny--but I've already covered that topic. I had plenty of material when she was a crying, fussing mess who couldn't be put down for a minute. Now I've got nothing. Well, except for the cutest, most cuddly-wuddly little baby-waby!
P.S. Thanks to the people, er, person who was concerned about my absence. Heidi, you're the best blogging friend a person could ever have! sniffle 2005/7/24 Response to unsolicited adviceThe other day a relative called and spent the first 15 minutes going on and on about all the things that are wrong with the way I'm parenting. Mother-in-law. This relative shall remain nameless for privacy reasons. Mother-in-law. Anyway, said relative told my husband about the following parenting mistakes I am making. I also provide the response I would have given her had she presented these concerns to me personally. In no particular order:
1. You shouldn't be picking up your daughter every time she cries. You will spoil her. Let her cry it out.
First, you've only seen my daughter on a handful of occasions. It is amazing that you can tell she's spoiled. Yes, I pick up my daughter every time she cries, and I will continue to do so. You cannot nurture an infant too much. Also, I surely don't like to be ignored. Who does? Why would it be any different for a baby? Ignoring a baby's cries is like ignoring someone while they're talking to you. It's rude, and borderline abusive. Period.
2. You shouldn't be carrying around your daughter, she'll be clingy when she gets older. She can sit by herself.
If she wants me to carry her, I'll carry her. She is four months old; babies don't like to be alone. I'm sure by the time she goes to college, I will no longer be carrying her around in a sling. They don't make slings that big.
3. She should be sleeping in her crib. Co-sleeping will spoil her, and she'll never be able to sleep on her own.
I like to use the following question for comments like this: "Tomorrow morning, would you rather wake up in jail, or next to your mother?" I would rather wake up next to my mother. How about you?
Listen, my daughter sleeps through the night while in the bed with me, and not so well in the crib. And god bless it, I NEED TO GET SOME SLEEP TOO! Everyone is sleeping quite well under the current arrangements, thank you very much. If she is still sleeping with me in high school, we've got reason to be concerned. Otherwise, no.
4. Baby needs to be on a schedule. She should go down for naps at a certain time.
Will someone please explain to me how you get a baby (or a toddler, or a teenager, or an adult for that matter) to go to sleep on demand? Baby and I actually do things basically in the same order every day, but sometimes the time varies a bit each day. So far the flexibility thing is working out for us just fine. Baby is content. Everyone is happy.
So mind your own business. 2005/7/20 I came, I saw, I quivered in the cornerBaby and I attended our first mom/baby discussion group. Unfortunately, we were the only non-breastfeeding pair. I think these "discussion" groups are organized just so breastfeeding mothers can go out in public and breastfeed. It was only an hour and a half long, but everyone managed to feed their baby at least once. Except me. Baby was fed formula before we left the house, and there was no need to feed her again during the discussion group.
Of course, Baby did not behave herself, which is precisely what I had feared. All the other babies were content--granted they all had a boob in their mouths. But not mine. She started to cry as soon as we sat down. (She prefers to be a baby on the go.) I stood in the corner with her rocking back and forth, and back and forth...
After spending about an hour listening to breastfeeding concerns and helpful tits, er, tips, it was my turn to introduce myself and baby and share any concerns or problems I've been having. But no one had any advice on why my child screams at toys. Or why I can't put her down for any extended period of time. They just stared at me like I was from another planet. Perhaps the formula-feeding planet, where the babies scream at toys.
Next group meeting: AA. 2005/7/19 SnoozeWhere is the snooze button on a baby? I'm new at this, and I can't seem to find the button.
Toronto artist Roger Wood is the maker of the unique timepiece below. The link to Klockwerks is here! 2005/7/14 Co-Sleeping: Nice for Baby, Sucks for YouI have a "high need" child, which is just a nice way of saying that I have a big pain-in-the-butt baby. Baby doesn't like to be left alone, so my husband and I carry her around like a little monkey. Then I have the added bonus of sleeping with Baby. Strangely enough, my pediatrician recommended this arrangement.
Let me tell you, it's like sleeping with a very small, but powerful furnace. That little baby head is especially hot. It would be nice for winter but right now it's hotter than hell, and nothing makes me crabbier than heat. And if you try to scoot away from her, she just nestles in closer.
Baby also hogs the bed. An entire queen-size bed. I have just one small sliver of bed on which to get the five stinkin' hours of sleep I get a night.
Baby is so cute when she sleeps though. The soles of her feet are together so her legs bow out. Then she's got her chubby arms up over her head. She looks like a little butterfly. A hot, little butterfly that is trying to take over my bed. It's a good thing she's so cute.
Where is my husband, you ask? Sleeping peacefully in the guest room, of course. Duh. Where else would he be sleeping? It's quiet in there. No hot, bed-hogging baby. No snoring wife. But let me tell you, one of these days I will get even. As God as my witness, I will get even. 2005/7/12 Oops. Down goes baby.The straps on baby seats are very important features. Yes, it looks like your three-and-a-half month old couldn't fall out of the seat regardless of the straps but, trust me, she can.
This was my plan: Baby could watch her Baby Mozart movie for ten minutes while I take the clothes out of the dryer, fold them and put them away. I put her in the seat, decided against the straps and did my thing with the laundry. I came back a few minutes later and found her on the floor next to the baby seat, tummy down, head up and talking to her hands.
No fuss. No crying. The way she pitches a bloody fit when a pacifier falls out of her mouth, you would think the same would happen when she falls. Instead, I pick her up and get a big smile. It's like she was telling me, "I know what you did, and I'm going to use this against you until the day you die, lady."
I make fun of this now, but my heart just sank when I saw her on the floor. Also, I kept poking at her to make sure she didn't slip into a coma while taking a nap just 30 minutes after the fall. No coma. Whew.
P.S. Yes, Mom, I know. Next time I'll be more careful with your granddaughter. 2005/7/8 The newest batch of couch potatoesI've got issues with television and, generally, we don't watch it. But today I needed a way to keep Baby occupied while I showered. (I napped while she napped and, therefore, didn't get the shower in like I normally do.) So I had mixed feelings when my child was absolutely mesmerized by watching Baby Mozart, a video mostly comprised of puppets and spinning tops while electronic music of Mozart plays in the background.
She loved it. She was talking at the TV. Laughing even! She liked it so much, that I played the 30-minute video again in order to get a baby-free lunch.
So now I feel guilty. My baby spent one hour today in front of the tube. No human contact that hour: she was strapped into a baby seat, watching the television. Something I said I would never do. But I was stinky, and desperately needed a shower. The quiet lunch was an added bonus.
She's a couch potato at three and a half months. Thanks to her lazy, smelly and hungry mother. Well, at least it will give her something to talk about with her therapist when she's older. 2005/6/27 Sears, you're OK!After I posted my complaint about the portraits I got at Sears on June 24, I decided to give them a call and see if I could get my money back. The assistant manager asked if I wanted to come back in and have them retaken. So, I hauled baby back to Sears for more pictures today. We had a fantastic photographer, who was a pro with small babies. They canceled Friday’s order and I ordered all new poses from today’s session. In fairness to Sears, I wanted you all to know that they did right the situation, and I couldn’t be more pleased with the photos. If you’re in the Madison area, take your tot to see Ann at Sears in the East Towne Mall. She rocks! 2005/6/26 Hope you like the t-shirt I ruined for you, Grandpa!My dad, who lives in Arizona, is seeing his granddaughter for the first time tomorrow. For Father’s Day (belated, of course), we got him a t-shirt that you put a child’s handprints on. This craft project was perhaps too advanced for a three‑month old baby. That blob on the right is where she grabbed the shirt with a paint-covered hand. And, no, my baby doesn’t have just four fingers on her left hand. 2005/6/24 Look over here! Smile!Ever try to take a picture of a three-month-old baby? No? Well neither did the “photographer” at Sears today. OK, my baby isn’t the most cooperative of children; I’d be the first to admit it. But the photographer was probably someone on summer break from school, getting paid seven bucks an hour, with no artistic capabilities at all. The pictures are flat and lifeless, the lighting is bad, and the backgrounds are just plain weird. This is the sum total of what the photographer tried with my child:
Of course, baby didn’t look at her once. Instead, my child tried to suck on the buttons of her bib overalls. Gifted, she is! I just dropped 58 bucks to get enlargements of the crap, because that’s what you do at the “official” three month stage. Plus, I got the “Smile Savers” card go I can go back every three months for more crummy semi-professional pictures. Anyone want an 8x10 portrait of an unhappy baby, eating her clothing, on what looks to be the planet Mars? Any takers? 2005/6/23 Healthy baby?When baby and I have been out and about recently, I’ve gotten a few comments like, “Wow, that baby looks healthy.” At first I was puzzled, but then realized that it’s probably because she’s, well, chubby. Are people telling me that my baby is healthy, but what they really mean is that she’s fat? Listen, my baby doesn’t need to be like one of those three‑foot, nine‑pound supermodel babies in order to be special. She’s special. Gifted even. So stop it! Or perhaps these people were trying to be nice, and they really did think she looked healthy. In that case, thanks! 2005/6/22 Dr. Ferber is one mean dudeOK. I’ve done some brief research on the Ferber Method. I don’t like it. If babies communicate by crying, then ignoring their cries is like ignoring someone when they’re talking to you. Does Richard A. Ferber, MD, the “mastermind” behind this method, have children of his own? I couldn’t do that to my little snuggle pookie. I have complete faith that some day soon my baby will sleep through the night on her own. Until then, there’s always Fiji. Still screaming[Actually, she’s taking a nap right now which is why I have time to “blog.”] Thanks to Heidi and Nikki for the tip on the Ferber Method. I’ve not heard of this method, but two complete strangers on the Internet wouldn’t lead me astray! I had resolved last night to try the Fiji Method. That’s where I go to Fiji for two weeks and leave baby home with my husband. But perhaps this Ferber thing is better. I’ll keep an open mind about Ferber, but Fiji will definitely be Plan B. 2005/6/21 Please stop screamingEither my 12-week-old daughter is starting to get teeth, or the heat is getting to her too, but the screaming today has been unbearable. I just spent two hours wandering aimlessly around the local Wal-Mart while my husband was home with baby. I only bought five items, but got two full hours of no screaming. Baby screams when you put her down (even for a minute to go to the bathroom), she screams when she can’t get the whole toy in her mouth, she screams while eating, she screams when you’re holding her and stop moving, she screams at the cats, she screams before her nap—in fact, she is screaming right now. The only way to get her to stop screaming today has been to dance with her while listening to the Buena Vista Social Club CD. That’s it. Trust me, you can’t dance all day. I tried. Yes, she’s still screaming. How late is Wal‑Mart open? 2005/6/20 Three MonthsMy daughter turned 12 weeks yesterday! Here is a top ten list of the things that made the past three months possible: 1. 1. My sister and brother‑in‑law: They bought up every baby store in the tri-state area to get everything baby needed. Thanks, R&R! 2. 2. Pampers Swaddlers diapers: These diapers never leaked. I tried numerous diapers, and they all leaked pee pee (usually when baby was in my bed). 3. 3. My husband: My heart goes out to single parents out there. If I didn’t have an extra set of hands, I would now be making wicker baskets in “the ward.” Thanks, Honey! 4. 4. Over The Shoulder Baby Holder: Baby couldn’t be left alone for a minute the first few weeks, so I wore her in a sling. My aching back… 5. 5. My mother, who knows everything about babies: Thanks for all the help and advice, Mom! 6. 6. The Medela Symphony breast pump: This is one massive hospital-grade electric pump. I pumped three long weeks because baby wasn’t cooperating with breastfeeding. If you gotta pump, go with the Cadillac of breast pumps! 7. 7. Lexapro: If it weren’t for this stuff, I probably would have killed somebody. 8. 8. Dr. Brown’s bottles: These are the best. They did everything the package said they would: prevent gas and colic. But at $4 a pop, they better be good! 9. 9. Digital camera: I got a Canon PowerShot A95 a day before I went into labor. Some of the pictures in the hospital were a bit blurry (I didn’t know how to work the stinkin’ thing), but now we have about 500 pictures of baby, and I can send them all by e‑mail! 10. 10. The stroller I got at a garage sale: This stroller is the reason I had a baby in the first place. I got this practically brand new stroller for $10 at a garage sale last spring. At that time my husband and I weren’t even talking about having kids. But then I got this stroller. And needed a baby to put into it. I can still picture my husband’s face when I brought the stroller home! 2005/6/17 Level 2Today my baby started using level 2 bottle nipples! She had gotten so incredibly slow at finishing her bottle, something needed to be done. So we’ve kicked it up a notch! The first bottle was a success—she finished four ounces in less than 15 minutes! (As opposed to the 30 excruciating minutes it took her to drink three ounces previously.) OK, there was some spitting up afterwards, but I’m hopeful that she’ll get used to the quicker flow in a day or two. She did take more milk than usual, so this could play out two ways: 1. 1. She'll go longer between feedings; or 2. 2. The interval between feedings will remain the same, so she’ll just get rounder. The nipple package said that these level 2’s are for babies three months and over. Baby is 11 weeks. Which proves what I’ve been saying all along: My child is advanced! 2005/6/10 My baby’s dayThe following represents how my 10-week-old baby spends a typical 24 hours:
Someone told me that having a baby was rewarding. I’ve also heard that once the baby starts smiling at you, it makes it all worth it. Apparently, these people were too sleep deprived when they had newborns of their own to remember what exactly it’s like. And in a few years I, too, might pass along the same crappy advice to a new mom. Yes, the smiling does help. But I guarantee you no one is smiling at 4:30 a.m. when you’re feeding baby for the second time that night. |
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